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ANTI PLANKERS AND HOW TO DEAL WITH THEM

Planking has touched a raw nerve worldwide, the nay sayers, cynics and putter downers are coming out of the wood work in droves, writing malicious articles about the idiocy of planking, and psychological treaties on what is wrong with a society of plonkers into planking. As an open minded planker, how can you deal with such despicable attitudes?

As they wave their fists at you take pictures of them, so 1. You can study their expressions at some later date, it is always best to know your enemy or 2. Send them copies of the piccies so they realise how unpleasant they look when they are angry.

When meeting a particularly nasty anti planker establish eye contact with them, and stare then down rigid.

Try to understand their point of view, after all everyone has a right to it If that does not work, tell them to B off or buy some coloured contact lenses. They will be so disconcerted by your eye colour change next time they see you, they will be open to reasoning.

Make sure your name is on their mobile, they will be more appreciative if they can shout abuse down the phone at you.

Ensure they understand they are far more rigid than you are, especially when you tap them on the top of the head from a great height, and great planking position.

Spend a lot of time laughing and joking with fellow planker’s right in front of them.

Quote Shakespeare in their presence. “To plank or not to plank, that is the question!”

It is important to remember that these callous folks have not understood planking is about to take the world. That every fourth person will be rebelliously planking all over the shop and the nay sayers will be in a minority. So much so, they will go rigid with frustration. You told them to get their act together, but did they listen? No, so let them deal with the planke out, fall out. In the mean time you are getting on with your audacious planking plans!


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